Social situations: neighbours, invitations, clubs

Introduce yourself to neighbours when you move with a simple greeting or a small card, and do not overdo requests.

• Quiet hours (Ruhezeiten) are important: from ten in the evening to six in the morning, and also the early afternoon in some buildings (rest time between one and three), and Sunday and holidays are quiet all day.
• Avoid loud music and noisy work such as drilling or running a washing machine loudly at these times.
• Tell your neighbours about any party in advance.
• The house rules (Hausordnung) on staircase cleaning and watering are followed in rotation.
• Problems are solved first by direct polite conversation.

When invited to a home be punctual, and bring a small gift such as flowers, chocolate or sweets, and do not bring uninvited guests without asking.

• Take off your shoes at the door if others do or the host asks.
• You may be asked to bring a dish (Mitbringsel or potluck) for parties.
• Tell the host beforehand about your dietary restrictions.
• End the visit at a reasonable time and send a thank-you message the next day.
• If you want to invite a German, tell them in good time, state the time clearly and serve something simple without complication, since people do not expect lavish hospitality.

In Germany there are millions of memberships in sports, cultural, music and voluntary clubs and neighbourhood associations.

• They are the best place to make friends, practise the language and integrate.
• Membership is often simple and cheap with an annual or monthly contribution.
• Try a football, swimming or running club, a shared kitchen, a reading group or volunteering at a food bank or in elder care.
• Municipalities organise multi-generational houses (Mehrgenerationenhaus) and get-together evenings for newcomers.
• Take part regularly and offer your help, since that opens doors.

You may notice that colleagues or neighbours are kind but do not invite you quickly, since friendship is built gradually and through shared activities.

• Do not wait for the other to take the initiative, invite them yourself to a coffee or a walk.
• Keep in touch regularly, since friendship needs planned dates.
• Friends may be from different cultures and backgrounds, which is a richness.
• Look for language cafés, migrant groups, local forums and events organised by mosques, churches and associations.
• Apps such as Meetup and nebenan.de help in getting to know those around you.

Germany is a secular country protecting freedom of religion, and Muslims, Jews, Christians and others live there.

• You may face curious questions about your clothes, food or religion, and you can answer calmly and simply if you wish, and you need not answer.
• The headscarf is allowed in most cases, with some restrictions in certain public jobs depending on the state.
• You may sometimes face offensive or racist comments, so do not stay silent, but document what happened and report it to the anti-discrimination office in your municipality, the Federal Anti-Discrimination Agency or the police in case of assault.
• There are associations that support victims free of charge.

When do night quiet hours begin?